Sleep Deprivation

I have put in long hours. I have pulled all nighters. I have gone days with just a few hours sleep.

Nothing, nothing prepared me for the last seven weeks. Seven (and still counting) weeks where neither my wife or I have gotten more than 3 hours of sleep in a row. Trading feedings? Trading nights? Doesn't matter. This baby is out for blood.

It is well known that sleep deprivation is a form of torture. It is used to break double agents, to exact information from prisoners of war and to get suspects to confess to grizzly crimes.

Freshmen.

The following are excerpts from a diary I have kept for the last seven weeks:

Day One:
I can't believe we have another little girl. Sadie is amazing! Ella is growing up so fast I totally forgot how small newborns are. Even her crying is cute.

Day Three:
Our little angel has been a little fussy. She must have her days and nights confused because she isn't sleeping for very long. Luckily Krissy and I prepared ourselves and came up with a nice little schedule. I am sure we'll be dragging a little, but we;ve done it before.

Day Seven:
Man, I am beat. I don't think I got a good night's sleep all week.

Day Eleven:
Krissy and I got into a fight at 3am over who's turn it was to feed Sadie. I could have sworn I did two feedings in a row. I am so tired I can't remember.

Day Fifteen:
Man, I am chugging so much coffee my intestines have become a slip n' slide. I can actually eat something and hear it hit the ground moments later.

Day Nineteen:
I don't remember driving to work this morning. I remember starting my car, but the next thing I knew I was napping in the parking structure at work. Odd.

Day Twenty-Five:
Krissy and I aren't speaking. That bitch got 4 and a half more minutes of sleep than me and she has the nerve to say she's tired.

Day Twenty- Eight:
I am not sure, but I think I saw God.

Day Thirty-Two:
I tried slipping a little Nyquil into Sadie's bottle. No dice.

Day Thirty-Seven:
I tried slipping a little Jack Daniels into Sadie's bottle. No dice.

Day Forty-One:
I just realized I have not worn pants for the last 8 days. It explains a lot of the looks. I thought maybe I had spit up on me or something. That would have been embarrassing.

Day Forty-Four:
I read all I could on exorcisms but Krissy will not let me paint the pentagram on the new carpet. Screaming "the power of Christ compels you" make the little devil cry more. I know Sadie, the light burns, it burns....

Day Forty-Five:
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.
All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.