Thursday, July 17, 2008

Obsessed

Some people are obsessed with a certain celebrity or musician. Some with Star Trek or cats.

I am obsessed with shitty tattoos and bad toupees. Love 'em. Love people watching and spotting the crap tat or horrible rug on someone.

I guess shitty tattoos fascinate me because it shows such an incredible lack of judgement. They fall into three categories for me.




1. Horrible artwork. When you go into a tattoo parlor all the artists have books of their work. Did this guy look at this particualr artist's past portfolio and say, "That's the Michelangelo-like artiste that I want putting a permanent image on my body!"





2. Moderate to Ok artwork, but HORRIBLE subject matter. Is THAT what you are so passionate about that you have to have it on your body?





3. Jokes gone wrong. Sure, they seemed funny at the time...





Of course these categories can be combined into a whole color wheel of bad choices...





Fucking Angelina Jolie's kid?



I could go on forever. Then there are the bad toupees. Look, I am bald. If I could wish to have one thing back it would be my hair with "MacGuyver" as a close second. But to put a piece of carpet on my head? To me I would rather have people say, "he's bald" than "holy shit do you see that thing sitting up there?" Men who wear toupees say, "It makes me feel better." Does it make you feel better to know people are laughing hysterically as they pass you in the mall? Does it make you feel better that you earned a spot in this blog as a horrible toupee? Being bald, I also think of the practicalities. What are people going to say when I suddenly come to work tomorrow with a badger on my head? Isn't that going to cause more of a stir and bring negative attention my way? To me I would rather have someone say nothing than, "DOES HE THINK THAT LOOKS GOOD?"

Here are some more images for your viewing pleasure...




3 comments:

rg said...

I could totally pick a husband out of this bunch!

Adam Freeman said...

But I thought these were your EX boyfriends...

rg said...

Only the DUDE guy. He broke my heart.