Thursday, June 22, 2006

Different Dimensions

The concept of multiple dimensions is an easy one to grasp but difficult to prove. Several different planes of existence occupying the same space.

Most people consider this concept pure science fiction...very "Twilight Zone." Nope. In fact, I visited one of those alternate universes today.

One of my shows is on location this week shooting sketches. Our AD and production manager found a great place dowtown. A studio complete with multiple sets. We could everything in one location. Perfect.

I did not go on the scout.

I pulled up to the location, a non-descript brick building in a real shitty part of downtown under the 10 freeway amongst all the warehouses and storage facilities. Yes, they had several sets all in one neat location. Why? Because it was a sex club, a swingers club to be exact, that specialized in role playing.

Different dimensions, alternate universes. We live in a reality built around our lives. If you are a sports fan your universe includes Madison Square Garden, ESPN, Sports Illustrated, a driving range etc. You travel through your life going from place to place that relates to you. A sports fan has probably never noticed they pass that ceramic craft store everyday. It's not in their relm of interest.

Whatever your interests are, there is a complete subculture out there that you are probably tapped into. Cat lovers, Civil War buffs, golf fanatics, alcoholics...and sexual deviants.

Every so often someone from one dimension gets transported into another. Maybe an equestrian dates a fisherman and finds themselves wading in a river up to their ass for the first time. Maybe a mild mannered TV Producer shoots some sketch comedy in a swingers club...

People must arrive in pairs. No single guests allowed. $35 each gets you through the door. It is not a club like a dance club. It is actually a maze of dark hallways lined with black lights and erotic art. Each wall contains many closed doors and not every hallway leads somewhere.

You enter, take off your clothes, and wander the halls and pick a room. Each room is a completely different, minutely detailed setting fit for role playing and, well...fucking.

An old west saloon, a full high school locker room complete with showers, a kindergarten classroom (really creepy), an operating room, a gynecologist's office with exam table and sturrups, a mock radio station, a quaint living room, a dining room, several bedrooms - some in red silk, some look like a New England B&B, there are private cubbies with stripper poles and the highlight - "blow job beds" - beds four feet tall so all the man has to do is sit on the edge of the bed. You can picture the rest.

There was a gift shop (which disturbingly enough did not sell condoms) and a wardrobe room where you can sign out costumes. The entire place felt...sticky. You just know people have had sex on every single surface.

It's not like I didn't know places like this existed, I just had never actually been in one. Or knew where one was for that matter.

Did you?

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