Friday, May 30, 2008

Got What She Deserved...

Another Nunley's story for you...

They had a ride called the "Hand Carts." They were exactly that - a little seat with hand crank that rode on tiny train tracks around a little fake town. Kind of a miniature version of this:

It was designed for kids 5 or 6 and under. One day I am working the ride and these older girls want to go on - they were probably 10 or so. I told them they couldn't but they begged and begged so I said ok, with the provision that they kept moving, gave enough room between them and any little kids, and didn't bump anyone.

Well, low and behold, these two girls take off, cranking away, and intentionally slam into the little boy ahead of them. Kid almost got whiplash from getting hit so hard from behind. So I kicked the girls off the ride.

This one girl unleashed a tirade of expletives not heard outside of certain Navy vessels. "You mother fucking, cock sucker blah blah blah." Yeah, a 10 year old.

I took the higher ground, asked them to not speak that in front of the smaller kids and their parents on line but nothing stopped her. I could still hear from the other side of the park.

Later that night I am still at the Hand Carts (I'll discuss the slave-like labor conditions another time...) and look who's back. The mouthy girl and this time she has brought her mother. Mom looked very nice, well put together, solidly upper middle class.

"I understand there was an incident with my daughter earlier?

Finally, I think. A responsible parent is going to teach their child a lesson.

"Yes ma'am. I told her she could go on the ride if she didn't bump anyone and then she rammed this little boy and almost seriously hurt him. I asked her and her friend to get off the ride."

Mom looks from me to her daughter, "Is this true?"

"Yes mom," she answers.

So the mom turns to me and says, "Just who the fuck do you think you are to kick MY daughter off a ride you minimum wage punk ass motherfucker? I outta cut your fucking balls off and...."

And the whole time the daughter is standing next to her saying, "He called you ma'am! He thinks your an old lady mom. What retard says ma'am?"

"One that treats people with respect I say," realizing I pretty much copped to being SOME form of retard. At least a respectful one.

Mom continues, "You let my daughter back on right fucking now or I am getting your boss."

I asked her to get my boss which she did. This woman goes on and on about how I am dispectful, what kind of place is he running her etc. You know, in retrospect, not one of the parents standing around witnessing this defended me...

My boss tells me to let her go on. "Fine," I say.

So the little bitch, smirking in my face, gets on the hand cart and begins to crank away. Thanks for hanging with me this long - THIS IS WHERE IT GETS GOOD.

As the girl is riding away she turns over her shoulder and gives me the finger. The rest happened in what seemed like slow motion...

She turns to flip me off which sends her beautiful, butt length blonde hair whipping around right on top of the cranks she is turning. For the first time in my life I believe there might just be a God as I watch her continue to crank and suck her hair into the crank (like a paper shredder) until it is all entrapped up to the roots. Her right cheek is now firmly pressed against the handles and ALL OF HER HAIR IS IN THE CRANKS.

And I am sitting there like Willy Wonka as the Oompa Loompas come with scissors and cut Veruca Salt's hair off to free her.

Karma my friends. Karma.

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